Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Day four. Perseverance.


How I think my stomach feels...click and see ;) 

John 10...all I can really say is BAAAHH! :) I am Your sheep, Lord. Thank you for being my Shepherd. Sorry for wondering, as many of your sheep tend to do. Thank You for knowing me and for accepting me, flaws and all. Lord, as tomorrow closes our challenge, I pray that I could hear your voice clearly. That I would honor you and I ask that the things I share about this experience would be things You have asked me to share.

I have not given up. I really asked God what to do and I feel encouraged today and even a little better. I am starting to get used to this (finally)! My body is so used to being taken care of and I think I am upsetting it! I believe I have come to a happy medium. I will finish my challenge after five days. One week may be asking too much. That's my own body's weakness. I am still feeling drained but I have a renewed sense of encouragement. Thank you for all of your prayers. I cannot express how much they mean to me! I am still processing some good stuff..I may have to talk it out in person because my thoughts are all over the place right now. I think part of that may just be that I have been under nourished these few days. I have found that my thoughts are more clouded during this period which is difficult for me, as I am usually very articulate.

I have really become aware of how truly wasteful I am. I have discovered a few things that have been hiding in my fridge (as I open it and stare at all the food I cannot "afford") that I had forgotten were in there. As I turned on the garbage disposal to rid my fridge of old taco meat, old beans, and wild rice made a week ago I began to think about what I was doing. My body was crying out for food, and here I was throwing once perfectly good food away. I would have never thought twice a week ago about doing this. Yes, I am always sad to waste food...but oh my gosh. I then examined my pantry and began really looking at the items that have not moved in months ( I know you have some of those too) and I began to think of how good they looked. All I could say was "WOW". 

There are so many things I take for granted. There area so many blessings the Lord has bestowed and entrusted to me that I know I have just tossed on the shelf and forgotten about. There are a few things that God has really made strong in me, and a few of those have made the shelf list. My prayer, Lord, is that you would show me what I have carelessly tossed to the shelf. Please, Lord, help me not waste the beautiful gifts and talents You have blessed me with. I want to clean out the shelves and toss those old behaviors and habits that are not from You. Please, help me clear the junk and digest the good stuff you made for me. My body needs the nourishment only You can give. 

Meals:
  • Breakfast: Oatmeal 1/2C $.08, Hot Coco $.11
  • Lunch: Fluffer nutter sandwich $.32
  • Snack: 1/2C popcorn $.07, 1 Tortilla $.08, KFC honey=Free (odd snack...hunger is a vicious beast! I ate what I could afford and sounded great...I now realize this sounds gross...but it was AMAZING!)
  • Dinner: Ramen $.17 ( I did not have the intention of eating Ramen again but I needed something cheap so that I could afford my Orange. I needed the vitamin C) Saltines 5 $.04
  • Dessert: Orange (small) .$12
TOTAL: $.99

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